I'm omniverous in my desire and, if I could, I'd have you all. The symmetrical and the lop-sided; the bountifully swollen and those with small hard bodies; the tall, the short; the disgraced and the disgraceful.
But I wasn't always the hoary old badger that you know and tolerate, I was a sweet and romantic lad- devastated by human contact and the fallout of relationships. Once, after being dumped, I was physically sick every morning and then spent a week in Hull.
After another relationship ended I spent the whole night colouring in every letter "G" in Joyce's "Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man". More than anything I knew it was going to be seen. It was a bitter and knowing act- born out of pretence, a dramatic gesture at a remove, pretending to be a romantic hero. Then again, maybe the act is enough? It was a kind of expression of how I felt.
Authenticity is prized highly in music more than any other art form but I truly believe that you can be authentic without being truthful. And heightened gestures are not for the rich and beautiful (it seems you can't be one without the other), they are for us. We, the brittle and the distorted, are more honest in our posturing and pretending than anything else.
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